Carol Benner

Obituary for Carol Benner

Written with love and humor by Charm O'Ryan

On January 26, of 2026, at the young age of 64, a beautiful chapter of our lives closed with the unexpected passing of our beloved Carol Diane Silva Benner.

The intriguing story of Carol's life began when she was born in Gooding, Idaho on September 5th, 1961 to Chester and Waneta Silva. For the most part, she grew up in Gooding, her family moving to California for a brief spell, before returning to their hometown.

At fifteen, with her widowed father's blessing, she left home and moved to Mountain Home, Idaho. There, she lived with her godmother and cousin, Betty Mangini, along with Betty's husband, Larry, and daughter, Charm. Betty's son, Ted, who lived on his own, quickly welcomed Carol as part of the family. Betty referred to Carol as her Blonde Daughter or, simply, Diane. 

Little did Carol know she’d gain a beloved sister in her second cousin, Charm, and their sister-like bond would last their entire lives. In high school, the girls only a year apart, told everyone they were “cou-sisters.” They even invented their own language so they could talk in the halls and no one would know their secrets. They took the same drama class and were in several plays together. They also worked together at a burger joint known as the Hungry Onion (a local high school hangout), as vivacious carhops and had loads of fun. They created many priceless memories in 1978 and 1979 and agreed that, one day, when they found the men of their dreams, they’d stand as Maids of Honor in one another’s weddings.

After graduation, life took the girls in separate directions for a time. But they kept their connection strong, having many long-distance phone bills to prove it. When Charm eloped, however, Carol liked to never forgive her.

On November 5th, 1981, Carol gave birth to a baby boy—Joshua Joseph Silva. She doted on Josh and was a great single mother. Ten years later, she married Matt Benner (Charm being her Matron of Honor as promised) and the new family moved to Colorado. It was then that Carol gave Josh a couple of siblings: a brother—Christian Michael Benner born October 15th, 1992; a sister—Brianna Christine Benner born November 29th, 1995. Better employment opportunities moved the family to Tennessee in 1999.

Family-oriented, Carol loved being a wife and mother ... she considered motherhood one of her greatest accomplishments. She could whistle (her fingers pinched beneath her rolled tongue) so loud, her kids could hear it blocks away and knew it held a message: “time to get our butts home!” Later, she established a yearly family tradition of watching, Miracle on 34th Street every Christmas Eve. Sadly, though, in 2005, a heart-breaking divorce occurred and Carol found herself a single mother, yet again. It was at this point her children became her whole world. She persevered, pushing away her own pain, to help them through their sadness, and did her best to make them all a new life.

Needing a change, Carol returned to Idaho in 2013, moving the children that still lived at home with her to Idaho Falls. They lived with Charm and her husband for a few months before settling in Shelley. And the cou-sisters were finally back together!

Besides her family, other things Carol loved: gardening and growing indoor plants; treasure hunting at garage sales, animals … she had many dogs and cats throughout her life; making dried floral arrangements; cooking, which she was one hell of a GREAT cook; and scary movies. Needless to say, Halloween was her favorite holiday. Thank God, Carol loved Jesus too! Otherwise, Charm, who does not like scary movies nor Halloween, might have questioned which path her soul lingered near? Sarcasm was Carol’s humor of choice, which her cou-sister often warned her that sarcasm was border-line bitch and not always funny. And, as usual, Carol promptly ignored her.

Carol worked various jobs throughout the years. From car hopping to restaurant manager to home health to florist shops, she was pretty much a jack of some trades. She also traveled in the earlier years of her life, the most memorable a trip to Italy with her older sister, Linda. She also took several trips to visit family and friends, and truly enjoyed camping, fishing, and board games too.

She is survived by her children: son, Joshua Silva of Tennessee; son, Christian (Kat) Benner of Idaho Falls; daughter, Brianna Benner of Tennessee; one granddaughter, Leila Silva, also of Tennessee. Her sister, Linda (Nelson) Deane of California; her sister, Cheryl (Chris) Burns of California; her brother, James Silva of Boise; her cou-sister, Charm (Leo) O’Ryan of Idaho Falls; the rest of her Mangini family; her two dogs: Jasper and Tiberius; two nieces and two nephews, numerous cousins and friends, and a handful of helpful neighbors … all of whom richly loved her. She was preceded in death by her parents, Chet and Waneta Silva, her Godmother, Betty Mangini, and many fur babies.

Though at times Carol felt alone and misunderstood, with help from heaven, professionals, and her family and friends, she bravely faced-down depression and only left this earth when God called her home.

Carol touched peoples’ lives more than she ever knew. Upon learning of her death, two old friends wrote the following: From Rodney Dudley, “So sad to hear that she has passed, as she was one of my fondest memories growing up.”

And Perry Drake said, “Ditto, Rod. She was one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met.” There is no doubt their kind words made Carol smile down from heaven.

Although our hearts are broken, and Carol Diane Silva Benner will be sorely missed by her precious children and all who loved her, we cannot help but envision a pain-free young woman, reunited with her parents, grandparents, and so many others she has loved and lost throughout the years. Just imagining the joyous reunion she’s having at this very moment helps comfort us.

And, just knowing Jesus holds her safe in His loving embrace is grand too. I mean, who can think of a better place to be?

With the closing of the book on Carol’s mortal life, we do not write, “The End.” For it is, in truth, a new beginning, with a new pain-free body cloaked in the forgiving grace of immortality. And she will never again taste death.

One day, the cou-sisters will be reunited. But until that glorious day arrives, another piece of Charm’s heart can only be found in Heaven…

“I love you, so much, Carol, and will miss you every single day. Give my mama kisses for me and I’ll see you both, one day soon. Come, Jesus, come!”

***A Celebration of Life for Carol will occur in the not too distant future. Please check back to the Buck Murphy’s obituary site for it to be listed. Or get a hold of Charm O’Ryan or Christian Benner for further details.